I went to the Dollar Store Friday after work. It sure was warm in there because their AC was on the fritz. I pushed my cart through anyway since it was the Dollar Store and you just never know what new dining experiments have been placed on the shelves since the last trip. I placed cat food, Diet Cokes, strawberry PopTarts and a bunch of other grocery items in my cart before running into a neighbor that I had not seen in several months. I turned my back on my cart and gossiped with her until it became too unbearable in the store to just stand there. We said our goodbyes and I turned and grabbed the cart and went to stand in the check out line FOREVER while one of the two checkout ladies worked at a pace that would put slugs in a coma. The second checkout lady was flirting with the Pepsi delivery guy and was having a wonderful time although he did not appear to speak the English language – he just stared at her and nodded his head and looked more uncomfortable than just too warm because the AC was out. Finally! It was my turn to check out!
The only items I recalled putting in the cart were the dog food, Diet Dr.Pepper and the Wild Berry PopTarts. Wait a minute… I could not recall getting the fungal toe cream, the Tinactin Fungal spray, the Fixadent, Beanie Weinies, baked beans, Kosher pickles, or white bread. White bread? I have not bought white bread in years! I’m a little bit slow but it did dawn on me that I was pushing the wrong cart. I was just too darned hot and tired to admit it! I could feel Naked Saturday beginning to stir and I had to get out of there quickly.
I bought everything but the Fixadent; it was not on sale and I still have at least eight of my own teeth. I tried the Wild Berry PopTarts this morning and they aren’t bad, however, the Diet Dr. Pepper would probably taste better with some of the fungal cream squirted in it. Speaking of fungal cream… a single gal just never knows when she might meet a guy that needs both it and the Tinactin Fungal spray; they might come in handy some day. (The older we get the less picky we get with our choices.) Tonight I will dine on Beanie Weinies, baked beans, Kosher pickles and will butter a slice of white bread; I just have to remember not to light any candles. The cats will eat the dog food, they are outside cats and will eat anything except the field mice they were placed out there to catch and dine on.
I hope I can handle the excitement of my meal tonight and will be able to return to work on Monday. I would hate to have to call in because Sophie, the Chihuahua
